Day 47: My “What The?” Moment

4,700 things gone, only 5,300 to go

My admiration for Oprah aside, I just can’t stand the phrase:  Aha moment!

So for the purposes of this post – I think I’ll call it a What the? moment.

I just had one.

I’ve been obsessing over decluttering, specifically my lack of decluttering, since the second we got home from Seattle late Thursday night.

It’s been a rough 24 hours during which I collected exactly 20 things and about six thousand negative beliefs about myself.

I could rattle off a list of them but they’re all just collected evidence that: “I’m not good enough.”

I swear I’m not going to go all Stuart Smiley on you – I only mention it because I didn’t even realize I was doing this until I sat down at the computer this morning.

My goal is to reach the 5,000 things mark before I leave for my summer vacation. In the last 24 hours, I’ve been telling myself I’ll never get it done, that there’s just too much to do, that I’m letting you down if I don’t get it done, that I only deserve a break if I’m completely broken before I get there. You know, the usual pre-vacation flogging.

This morning I actually looked at the calendar and realized I have four days to collect 300 things. Chances are I’ll hit the 5,000 mark before I leave. And, if not, and this is the important realization, I still deserve a vacation, and you’re probably not too concerned about my numbers anyway.

My negative self-talk had nothing to do with my decluttering project. I was essentially talking myself into giving up so I could justify feeling guilty about my vacation. What the…was I thinking?

I’m going to get out of my head and back into my cupboards before I take another leave of my senses. With all the collecting, counting and carting, there’s hardly any time left for self-flagellation. And that alone is a good enough reason to continue.

What I tossed today: 20 things from the game cupboard (games we’ve outgrown, boxes, pieces, instructions etc.) 20 pairs and socks (nothing makes me crazier than lost or holey socks), laundry room stuff – 50 things (old towels, sheets, bibs, blankets, a mop, a shark steamer, a filter for a vacuum we no longer have, single rubber gloves, a box of laundry detergent that we brought from the old house, and several empty containers and bowls Squirrel had been storing stuff in). At least 10 more items of outgrown kid’s clothes.

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6 thoughts on “Day 47: My “What The?” Moment

  1. This is why I don’t set challenges and goals for myself… I’m a rebel at heart and once I tell myself that I HAVE to do something, suddenly it becomes the most dreaded and horrific chore on the planet, and I become convinced that I am the most loathsome and worthless peon ever to walk the face of the earth because I don’t want to do it.

    Numbers, shmumbers! Go have yourself a good vacation, you deserve it!

  2. Bravo! You not only had your “what the?” moment (self-sabotaging) but better yet you PREVENTED YOURSELF FROM DOING IT!!! I can sometimes figure out when I’m self-sabotaging by rarely if ever can I stop myself from doing it! Well done and have a great holiday! :o)

  3. “I collected exactly 20 things and about six thousand negative beliefs about myself.”

    Well, if you can pitch 300 of those negative beliefs in the next three days, you’re home free!

    Don’t worry about letting readers down; we’re friendly strangers, and mean you no harm. And after all, the longer it takes you to declutter, the longer we’ll have to read your blog. Right?

    Good luck gearing up for a wonderful vacation.

    • “if you can pitch 300 of those negative beliefs in the next three days, you’re home free!”
      ha ha ha…I like the way you think. If we’re counting negative thoughts, I’m no longer worried about running out of things to ditch.

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