Day 85: Lost Nuts

8,500 things gone, only 1,500 things to go

These rollerblades are just as uncomfortable as they were in 1989.

Here it is. The real reason I need to declutter.
I lose stuff.
Big stuff.
I’m talking birth certificates, cell phones, health records, jewellery, wallets and keys.
I even lost a child once in Hawaii – near the ocean!!! Of course, he wasn’t really lost, just playing in the shower near the park while I (fearing the worst) ran frantically up and down the beach. It was heart stopping panic as any parent who has “looked away for just a second” will attest to.
I’m sure I ruined the aloha of more than a few vacationers. And it certainly eclipsed the drama of the lost keys.
My point is, people vary greatly in their capacity to function amidst clutter. Squirrel, for instance, can handle a stash in every bowl, basket, drawer and cupboard in every room. He’s also the quickest draw of important things I’ve ever met.
Passport?  Chik! chik!  File cabinet.
Health Cards? Chik! chik! Kitchen drawer.
Cell phone? Chik! chik! Front hall table.
TV remote? Chik! Chik! Couch cushion.
Car Keys? Chik! Chik! Coat Pocket.
It’s impressive to watch especially for someone who is driven mad by the sight of a box full of magazines, foodstuffs, toys, bike parts and ceiling paint. To me, that’s an afternoon of sorting, tossing and wondering. To Squirrel, it’s just a box of crap where he keeps his adjustable seat post.
Irrelevant things don’t phase him the way they phase me. He’s got it all (even my stuff) mapped out in the old noggin. There was a brief phase when he tried to wean me off his grey matter by answering all location questions with the very frustrating:
It’s where you put it last.
That lasted about as long as my attempt to teach him to store his things in half reasonable combinations.
Decluttering has become a hot topic around here so much so that our kids have joined the conversation. The other morning our oldest son asked:
If Daddy’s a Squirrel, what kind of animal is Mom if she loses everything?
Being inquisitive, I googled – forgetful animal. Popular legend has it that fish take the top honours. Remember Dory in Finding Nemo: “Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.”
So, if you’re using your grey matter for something other than memorizing the location of your passport, it’s okay. Just keep decluttering. Just keep decluttering. Just keep decluttering, decluttering, decluttering. 
It was Dory, after all, who found Nemo. Not bad for a fish with short term memory loss.
What I tossed today: game parts, TV, door bell, electrical face plates, hockey sticks, cloth shopping bags, posters, tent pegs, garden stakes, baby proofing supplies.

14 thoughts on “Day 85: Lost Nuts

  1. Oh you’re just TOO funny! And that picture is great too 🙂

    If it makes you feel any better, I lose things all the time ad people say we have nothing in our house! I have literally “lost” keys while they were sitting in the front door. Sad, but true. I’m sure you’ll get it much more together than me once the clutter is gone!

    • “I’m sure you’ll get it much more together than me once the clutter is gone!”
      Don’t be so sure! I’ve been known to lose stuff in the space of, oh – two seconds. It’s chronic, but I really appreciate your confidence in me. My nine year old took the picture. He was very serious about it. So sweet.

  2. I lose things quite a bit too, especially after I put the item in a “new, impossible to forget safe place.” Argh. Even lost a kid once, alas it was someone else’s which made it a bit worse I think. There was the guilt and panic of losing her, plus the fear of her parents murdering me. We found her in the end though.

    People also seem to have an amazing difference in their clutter tolerance. I find it impossible to fully relax in a mess,y cluttered room, whereas my boyfriend couldn’t care less. This makes for fun discussions!

    • Losing someone else’s child is infinitely more stressful. I did that once as well – except he was sitting right behind me. I bet you breathed a sigh of relief when you found her.
      I think you and your boyfriend must have some of the same discussions as Squirrel and I. So much excitement!

  3. Ha! I think that I have a bit of a squirrel like personality in this respect, because I tend to lose things when I “put them away”. It’s SOOOOO frustrating. I remember that I put it in some special place so I’ll be sure to find it when I need it, but hell if I know where that place is! If, on the other hand, I just leave it in one of my various piles of debris, then I know just where to find it! AAARRRRGGGHHHH!!! I wonder if there’s any way to change this or if I am just doomed.

    • I’ve given up on trying to change things about myself. Sure, I floss now, since the scare with gingivitis. And I exercise once a month, but a big thing like memory – well, let’s just say, I try to make life as comfortable for myself (and those around me) as possible. I say, just leave your stuff in the piles of debris. I’m a notorious piler, once something hits a cupboard there’s no way I can find it. Fortunately my piles are getting smaller and smaller.

  4. The worse thing I “lost” when I put them away was the keys to the safe deposit box. I couldn’t find them anywhere – not in the desk or the “money” drawer or the jewelry box. i had to meet the locksmith at the bank to get the lock drilled out. Missed work and had to pay $100. I found them 6 months later in the file labeled “important papers”

  5. Hm, I think I’ll stop saying this to my husband: “It’s where you put it last.”

    Although, I’ve discovered it’s a good negotiation tactic – I’ll find your phone if you’ll do x.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s